Picks 'n Pops: Illegal hugs, marketing hits and misses, and the worst defense ever

Every week I gather some thoughts about the Celtics, the NBA, and beyond and dump them here. Because I looked directly at the Celtics City Edition jerseys earlier this week and it's taken me until now to regain my focus.

- Joe Mazzulla is not really into deep, personal relationships with opposing coaches. 

“There's a cordiality there, but it's very important not to give away psychological tells and things that can lead to an opportunity to give away a psychological leak,” he said at the team’s Friday practice. “So just try to be cordial without giving away those psychological components.” 

That alone brings us into some fun Mazzulla quote territory, but there's an issue with his approach. Guys he cared for on his staff are being poached to become head coaches elsewhere. What happens in those situations?

“I told Charles (Lee) when he left, like I am not talking to you during the season, I'm not waving to you at the national anthem. I’m just not doing that, you are now an enemy,” Mazzulla said. “He breached NBA rules and came into the assistant coach's locker room and forced me to give him a hug. That could easily be a psychological tell that knocks you off your game competitively.  He knew what he was doing.”

Gotta watch out for those illegal hugs. Big problem in today’s NBA. 

- Friday was actually Boston’s first official practice since the start of the regular season. That's about a month of relying on just film sessions and light shoot arounds to address slippage. 

“You're making a list of like, here's what we have to fix immediately, here's what we have to wait until the next stretch of practice and shoot around to where we can clean up these things,” Mazzulla said “You're just trying to do it through shootarounds, through film as much as you can, even in the game, sometimes we're trying to adjust the things to clean things up.”

At this level, that will be enough to cover some of the little slippage along the way. But this stretch of practices is great to get back on the floor and hammer home some final details with some repetition. 

- I think Neemias Queta might be the biggest beneficiary of these practices. I don’t think the plan was to use him as much as they have, so this pivot means he needs some more practice reps to hammer home some finer points of what they need him to do. 

- Some of Friday’s practice included defensive drills with Kristaps Porzingis. So he’s inching closer to a return. December is only a little more than two weeks away. His return isn’t that far off. 

- The Giannis Antetokounmpo/Jaylen Brown/Nike saga is equal parts hilarious and fascinating. 

First of all, That a grown man thought to do the “too slow” handshake thing to someone in an NBA game is beyond funny … and yeah, also childish. What adults do that to other adults?

Brown calling Giannis out as childish after the game was interesting. I think he was holding back a laugh but I’m not 100% sure on that. He did take an elbow to the face prior to that so I can see where a grudge might be held here. 

Nike buying into this by tweeting this out after Antetokounmpo’s 59-point game was an incredible off-the-top-rope move: 

Nike’s social team throwing a shot Jaylen’s way after he blamed Nike for being left off Team USA is an incredible move for a brand. 

And then Brown went back at them. 

I agree with Jaylen on this one. It’s a little weird for Nike, be it through some kid on their social team or via a corporate directive, to continue taking shots at Brown here. 

Also, it plays right into Jaylen’s hands. He’s positioning himself as taking on the big corporation with his own shoe and them taking shots at him just allows him to play up the “David vs. Goliath” angle. Nike needs to take the Don Draper “I don’t think about you at all” approach with Brown and they're doing the opposite. All that tweet did was fuel social and blog posts that mention Brown’s feud with Nike and the shoe he’s launched. 

Brown wins this battle. Now let’s see what happens next. 

-  Derrick White getting a (Derrick) White Ale from Sam Adams is also pretty brilliant. And them ripping the commercial right from “The Town” is perfect. 

- Mazzulla’s love of The Town was even a Jeopardy answer 

Mazzulla was asked about it and said he couldn't care less. He just doesn’t play along with that kind of question, especially before a game. I hope he lightens up about that stuff over time. We’re entering Stripes territory here. 

Psycho : The name's Joe Mazzulla, but everybody calls me Psycho. Any of you guys call me Francis, and I'll kill you.

Me : Ooooooh.

Psycho : You just made the list, buddy. And I don't like nobody touching my stuff. So just keep your meat-hooks off. If I catch any of you guys in my stuff, I'll kill you. Also, I don't like nobody touching me. Now, any of you guys touch me, and I'll kill you.

Brad Stevens : Lighten up, Joe.

- The Celtics will wear their new City Edition jerseys tomorrow night, so bring your eclipse-watching glasses. 

These are awful. This shade of green should never be associated with the Celtics. 

- The NBA is considering a four-team tourney-style All-Star game. 

A couple of weeks ago, I suggested a six-team, "winner holds the court" type of tournament to fix the All-Star game, so I'm just going to take credit for the league stealing my idea.

- The Celtics have lost three straight games to the Atlanta Hawks when Trae Young hasn’t played. I’m just sayin’.

- Speaking of disgustingly bad defenders, what the hell was Luka Doncic doing on this play??

That was a tie game, in Utah, with the Jazz getting the last possession and Doncic just flat-out lost John Collins for a game-winning dunk. He just turned his back and let Collins get to the rim. 

The Mavs have time to figure this out, but Doncic is off to a bad start to this season. That defense was so bad that James Harden can point and laugh at him. 

At least we got this amazing meme out of it. 

- Speaking of disgustingly bad defenses, unless Khris Middleton comes back as something resembling his prime self, the Bucks are cooked.

- LeBron James says he doesn’t have much time left in the NBA. 

“I said the other night, I’m not playing until the wheels fall off,” he said. “I’m not going to be that guy. I’m not going to be the guy who is disrespecting the game because I just wanted to be out on the floor.”

You can love or hate LeBron, but what he’s been doing is impressive. He has four triple-doubles this season, including three in a row, and the Lakers are 7-4. He’s a month away from turning 40. 

We’re marveling at Al Horford doing what he’s doing at his age. How about what LeBron’s doing? He’s paid a lot of money to be able to do this at this age, so it’s good to see the return on investment. 

- Good to hear Gregg Popovich is doing better after a minor stroke. 

- This was supposed to be a cute moment with Mike Tyson and a child reporter. Mike’s ennui and nihilism did not take his audience into account when they sent this answer to his mouth. 

- I’ve seen guys pay tribute to a lot with their shoes, but Isaac Okoro wearing Woj Bomb sneakers because his deal was the last Adrian Wojnarowski broke before retiring takes the cake.

This opens up all sorts of options for players and reporters. Will Jayson Tatum wear pie-themed sneakers to honor one of my great baking analogies? 

… just pretend I’ve made a great baking analogy. It makes the joke funnier. 

- On a personal note, I’m excited for Emerson College naming their floor after Hank Smith: 

You might not think much about Emerson Men’s Basketball, a small Division 3 program at a journalism and arts school in downtown Boston. But two of Hank’s former players are running NBA teams (Sam Presti in OKC and Will Dawkins in Washington), one is a former GM (Rob Hennigan in Orlando), and dozens of his former guys are around the league as coaches, scouts, and the occasional writer who likes to think his analogies are good. 

Fact is, I never would have gone pro without Hank Smith. I never would have been prepared for the real world without him. He’s one of the hardest screws who ever walked a turn on the basketball sideline, but it made all of us who played for him better. 

- Lifelong New Englander John K was named People’s Sexiest Man Alive. 

Man… I want to thank all the people who finally recognized that I bring more to the table than just killer analogies. And yes, while I think my way of thinking adds to my appeal, I think it’s more my … 

… what do you mean keep reading the last name? 

… Oh. 

- Your current NBA Belt Champion: The Cleveland Cavaliers … still

- Today’s Bing AI-generated image: NBA Champs can’t muster the excitement for the NBA Cup 

- Here’s my latest podcast, if you’re bored: