Picks 'n Pops: Slowing down, loose teeth, and championship rings

Every week I gather some thoughts about the Celtics, the NBA, and beyond and dump them here. Because I'm I've been locked inside the Tesla Robovan for three days and now I think I'm Tony Stark. 

- There's a reason Sam Cassell is seen as one of the top assistant coaches in the game (if not THE best). Watch him working with Xavier Tillman not just on catching and shooting 3-pointers, but catching it out of rhythm and still having to make it. 

Cassell would hold the ball and say “Jayson, Jaylen, Jrue, DWhite .. now X” and then make the pass, emphasizing that all those other players will get considered before he does for the pass. It’s great preparation for his role. It’s real-world preparation.

And how about Tillman making all those shots?

- Jordan Walsh understands that he’s been playing way too out of control. 

“After talking to Jrue a lot, he’s told me that whenever you’re going 100 miles per hour, you’re gonna make a mistake,” he said. “But if you’re going 80-85, then you can make that right read, make that right decision, see the floor clearly 99 percent of the time. So that’s how I took it. Let me slow down a little bit. Like I can still get my first step off a triple threat and get my somebody. Let me just slow down a little bit so I’m a little more under control. I can see the floor, I can make the right read, stuff like that.”

I’m not gonna say I told you so …

… wait, yes I am. 

- The annual outrage over where random people rank players is always a blast. 

- Derrick White’s saga after his broken teeth is actually pretty incredible. They basically had to replace his whole upper front row of teeth. But part of that process included temporary teeth that could have fallen out when he was playing for Team USA in Paris. 

All this now makes White an honorary Bruins captain. Those are the rules. 

- The North Washington St. Bridge will now be known as the William Felton "Bill" Russell Bridge. The more things in Boston named after Bill Russell, the better. 

- Lonnie Walker is still with the team … for now. The deadline to decide is Saturday at 5 p.m. 

- Payton Pritchard spends ONE season with Oshae Brissett and suddenly he’s a content creator. 

Also, welcome to the world of tattoos, Payton. One day you’re starting with understated little things here and there, the next you look like Chris Andersen. 

- There's no truth to the rumor that the collective sighs of relief from Boston, after hearing Fenway Sports Group is focusing on buying an expansion NBA franchise and not the Celtics, has caused the formation of a category 5 hurricane bearing down on Lisbon, Portugal.

- I think Walsh has a great personality and I enjoy how energetic he is. 

But I resent his youth. Last season, Al Horford gave him a homework assignment of watching classic movies and … 

“So I started the Godfather, yeah. And then I saw it was in black and white, and I was like, ahh. The opening scene is super long, and I was like, ahh. I texted Al and was like, 'Al, I can't do it.' So I just started watching Friday, Next Friday, Friday After Next, trying to get through those movies."

Damn you kids and your short attention spans! 

That said, I would never just throw a 20-year-old into the deep end with a three-hour movie. These kids live in the TikTok and YouTube short generation. It’s like asking me to play 30 minutes in an NBA game right now. I’m asking for a sub after two trips up and down. 

- Happy trails, Aron Baynes, who has officially retired from basketball. His run in 2018 as a sudden flamethrower from 3 is one of the most amazing out-of-the-blue developments in team history. If the Sixers never make it to the Finals, Baynes’ 3-point outburst against them is one of the reasons why.

That alone should get his number retired in Boston. 

- Congrats to Hall of Famers Vince Carter, Chauncey Billups, and the rest of those enshrined. There have been some questions about Michael Cooper’s inclusion, which is exclusively because of his defensive prowess. I understand those, but I suppose the Lakers were owed one of those since KC Jones got into the Hall based on defense and championships. 

- Andre Drummond admitting to missing on purpose to pad his rebounding stats is ridiculous. 

You can’t claim to be the best rebounder ever and then say you’ve inflated your numbers. At least lie about it … you know, like when you say you’re the best rebounder ever. 

- All the Bronny James stuff on social media might be what sends me over the edge. TNT posted Kevin Durant fouling Bronny with the caption “KD TRIES TO BLOCK BRONNY!” as if it wasn’t just a normal, benign play.

I just can’t take this. I was joking about resenting Jordan Walsh’s youth earlier, but I really do resent how anything is content to kids today. Context is going extinct. 

- Congratulations to “Kawhi Leonard is out indefinitely,” for becoming the most-typed phrase in NBA history. 

- Kendrick Perkins got a multi-year contract extension with ESPN while Zach Lowe got laid off. Chew on that for a minute. 

- Sabrina Ionescu is cold-blooded. 

- It must be impossible to call a Toronto Raptors game with a straight face when Gradey Dick is on the floor. 

- This week’s Bing AI-generated image … wondering just how big the Celtics championship rings might be.

- Here’s my latest podcast, if you’re bored.