Picks 'n Pops: Succession, Sponsorshps, and an epic rant

Every week I gather some thoughts about the Celtics, the NBA, and beyond and dump them here. Because I need a break from sewing sleeves back onto my hoodies. 

- The Celtics guaranteeing all of their contracts is probably the clearest sign Boston is looking to make a move at the deadline. They are right on the edge of the second apron and need to get under that line by the end of the season if they can. If they weren’t going to make a move, they probably would have waived someone to get under the line. 

What will the move be? Probably not much, but a two-for-one deal could be coming up.

- I think most fans handled last night’s loss appropriately, but some people really want to act like good teams have never been blown out before. The Celtics got blown out and embarrassed in the 1984 Finals. Things turned out okay. 

- Derrick White is hereby banned from appearing on JJ Redick’s “The Old Man and the Three” podcast. He went into a shooting slump last year after joining it last year, and now he’s 5-23, 21.7%, since recording this year’s appearance. 

On a related note, if anyone is, like, a Shaman or something or has any experience in the dark arts, the Celtics may be interested in your services. 

- Maybe Jayson Tatum stole some of White’s shooting juju. Tatum is 6-12 on pull-up 3-pointers this month and 8-17 on overall pull-ups. He’s shooting 32.7% and 31.4% overall this season. If you’re wondering why he’s on fire right now, this is where you start looking. 

- All tomorrow’s return by Ime Udoka should remind people of is that he made his choice and he paid the price. 

- Draymond Green really said he thought about quitting the game because the league wanted him to stop assaulting people on the floor? That's not an endearing story. It makes him sound like a lunatic.

- I don’t even know who Jo Koy is.

- No one wants anything in the world more than Al Horford wants to quickly inbound the ball off a turnover.

- So happy that Tyrese Haliburton’s injury is relatively minor. 

- Good luck, Jerod Mayo. Following a legend is always tough.

- Bill Belichick’s exit is an all too familiar story. We never really get the storybook walking off into the sunset we’re looking for as fans. The people involved are either chasing history, chasing the high of competition, or simply just enjoying themselves too much to give up when we want them to. 

It’s also a reminder that as much as they're here to entertain us, we don’t get to call the shots about their lives.

- Adam Silver says the league has “talked about potential changes to the In-Season Tournament, everything from how to break tiebreakers to what the courts look like to maybe even the name of the overall tournament."

The courts will be repainted to look like whatever sponsor who ponies up the most cash wants it to look like. The IST isn’t just going to mimic the European soccer style of tournament, it’s going to be the first step into full Euro soccer sponsored jerseys, billboards, arenas … all of it. 

They might as well have Wu Tang Clan perform “Cash Rules Everything Around Me” with special guest P. Diddy doing “All About The Benjamins” at halftime of the next championship game. 

Just own it … like all those sponsors are going to own the tournament.

- I still can’t believe the NBA justified a jump shooter getting hit in the head during a shot. 

- The day after that Last Two Minute Report dropped, Joe Mazzulla randomly revealed that his favorite scene in his favorite movie, The Town, was when Ben Affleck’s character left a note on an FBI car before skipping town. 

“He skips by the FBI’s car and leaves a nice, well-thought-out handwritten note underneath the antenna and then gets out of town,” Mazzulla explained. “That's my favorite scene.”

The note said “Go F--- Yourself.” Maybe the revelation wasn’t so random after all.

- Here’s Darko Rajakovic’s less subtle way of sending that same message 

The difference is Mazzulla didn’t have to pay $25,000 to relay his message. 

- The official review process for flagrant fouls is hampered by slow motion replays. There's now way to tell intent from slowing things down a million times. By not watching them in real time, you strip all context out of the play. 

- Here’s the tribute video Milwaukee showed for Jrue Holiday:

- Here’s a fan winning $100,000 by hitting a halfcourt shot. 

-This week's AI generated image captures the essence of Celtics-Bucks:

- The current NBA Belt champion: The Indiana Pacers 

- Here’s my latest podcast, if you’re bored (or in need of a little therapy after last night's loss)