Kevan Miller, still on road to recovery, reflects on missing 2019 Cup run: 'It definitely keeps me awake at night'

There are few players that can both dole out — and absorb punishment — quite like Kevan Miller. 

For a blueliner sanctioned for dropping the gloves throughout his prep and collegiate career, Miller quickly developed a reputation in the following years as one of the more feared skaters in the pro ranks — with the Los Angeles native winning most decisions by way of a heavy hook and a strong chin. 

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“It kind of came natural to me,” Miller said during a virtual town hall with season-ticket holders on Thursday. “I have an older brother and a younger brother. I'm the middle child. I took my fair share of lickings as a kid growing up. I think that helped.”

Miller’s hard-nosed style of play has left many welts on the opposition over the years, but the 32-year-old defenseman holds a fair share of scars himself over seven years in Boston. 

The latest has kept him out of game action since April 2019. 

During a 2018-19 campaign in which Miller fought through and bounced back from a broken hand, damaged larynx and torn oblique, a vertical fracture to his kneecap proved to be one injury too many — or rather, too severe.

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Despite the damage sustained to his kneecap, suffered during Boston’s penultimate game of the regular season against the Wild on April 4, an undeterred Miller remained hopeful for a shot to play in the Stanley Cup Final — traveling down to North Carolina with the rest of the club for Games 3 and 4 of the Eastern Conference Final against the Hurricanes. 

However, while rehabbing off the ice, Miller suffered a horizontal fracture to the same kneecap — ending his season for good and forcing the rugged defenseman to watch his team fight, and eventually fall, to the Blues over the following weeks.

More than any affliction sustained from a bone-crushing hit or grueling rehab — being on the outside looking in as the Bruins failed to counter a physical St. Louis club stands as the pain that cuts the deepest for Miller in his pro career. 



"Obviously, I would have loved to play, but I think team-wise, it was special to see some individual and team performance that kind of went through that whole Cup run," Miller said. "It's special to be around. It's an infectious atmosphere and I know the guys — obviously we fell one game short, but it was a really special run and it was cool to watch. Personally, for me, it was probably one of the hardest things I've had to go through, to be honest with you. Not being able to be out there with your team and helping and being on the sideline watching, knowing that I definitely could have helped. God, I wish I could have.

"So that was bittersweet. I'll be honest with you, it definitely keeps me awake at night still. Knowing that, you know, as a kid that you want to win a Stanley Cup and you're so close. It just didn't didn't line up correctly. So it was bittersweet."

Things haven't been any easier for Miller since the 2019 postseason, to say the least. Despite missing the start of the 2019-20 campaign while still rehabbing his kneecap, it appeared as though a December return could have been in the cards — until another setback prompted another procedure and sent all parties back to the drawing board. 

Near the time of the season's pause, Miller once again was back on the ice at Warrior Ice Arena, but Don Sweeney poured cold water on the potential of Miller returning for a playoff push this summer.

“Kevan’s just had some setbacks,” Sweeney said. “I don’t believe at this time that it will be in his best interest to try and ramp up in a short span with the hopes of playing this year. Our intentions are for Kevan to be 100% healthy so he can resume when we start the next season.”

On Thursday, Miller confirmed that said setback was indeed another procedure — his fourth since that fateful crash into the boards up in Minnesota back on April 4.

"As far as far as hockey and rehab goes, I'm still rehabbing," Miller said. "I was in on a good trajectory there, skating and whatnot and then I had a setback. I think Sweens kind of talked about a little bit, so I'm just coming off surgery that I had eight weeks ago. So timing-wise, things have been good for me. I'm off crutches now and walking around again. So things are good. Most of my rehab has been done in Boston. I've been here ever since.

"So it's been a little bit different, obviously, with having to rehab mostly at home, but thankfully, I guess if you want to call it thankfully, but I've been accustomed to having most of the stuff that I need at home now for a little bit to make sure that things are things are moving along well. But yeah, I'm feeling good now and back on the train to get my knee healthy again."

Both the optimist and warrior, Miller believes fortune will once again fall his way for the 2020-21 campaign — giving the rugged defenseman a chance to get back on the ice and logging regular minutes for the first time in over a year.

It remains to be seen if such a return will be with Boston, given both Miller's upcoming UFA status and the emergence of younger contributors on the blue line such as Jeremy Lauzon, Connor Clifton and others further down the pipeline. But when discussing the fate of the career Bruin last month, Sweeney did note that Boston would be interested in giving Miller another shot — whenever the start of the likely delayed 2020-21 campaign gets underway.

“We know Kevan is a UFA, so we’ll entertain the opportunity to bring Kevan back and he will also entertain whether or not he wants to come back," Sweeney said. "But most importantly in this case for Kevan, he needs to get back to being absolutely fully healthy and I don’t think in a short span we’re going to want to put him in any situation where he could jeopardize himself with any further setbacks. He’s got a longer timeline to make sure that he does things in smaller stages that would afford him the opportunity to be 100% healthy and return to play.”

Whether it be on a "prove-it" deal or even PTO (professional tryout) agreement, one thing is for certain. Despite such a miserable stretch of poor luck, Miller isn't ready to hang up his skates quite yet.

If the last 13 months haven't broken such resolve, what else could?